Salut Toshiko!

2008 June 23 at 4:01 pm (Uncategorized)

Je suis très heureux que tu as enfin reçu ma lettre – ça pourrait être le commencement de nos correspondances écrites! Mais bon, il faut attendre jusqu’à ce que j’aie une adresse à New York…

Le dessin inclus est venu d’un calendrier de 2007.

J’espère que ton vol se passe agréablement et tu arrives à dormir un peu. C’est toujours mon problème, je ne peux point m’endormir en avion et après quelques heures, je commence à me sentir ennuyé et fou. Je ne sais pas combien d’heures ça prend entre Paris et Tokyo, mais je me prépare pour les 12 heures de Los Angeles au Japon!!!

Quant à Masumi, je ne sais pas. Je ne lui parle pas régulièrement comme toi, mais il me semble qu’elle est toujours très occupée par son travail. Peut-être elle ne te répond pas encore à cause de ça. En tout cas je vais lui écrire une petite note bientôt, on verra… La dernière fois que j’ai été à Tokyo, on s’est revus et elle m’a invité au diner; elle était très sympa, envers mon ami japonais Yusuke aussi. Donc j’imagine qu’elle est juste un peu fatiguée.

Je serai très content d’explorer la vie nocturne japonaise avec toi! Je vais rechercher des bars et des restaurants sympas. Pendant les journées j’estime qu’on va faire toutes les choses touristes et du shopping, mais j’aimerais bien découvrir des “trésors cachés” où qu’ils soient. On n’a pas encore décidé sur l’emploi du temps, mais nous sommes assez ouverts.

D’abord, je veux te voir! Mon amie Yumi doit être libre ces soirs-là aussi; elle parle japonais et anglais. Il sera un bon mélange de langues entre nous!

Okay, on se parlera plus comme s’approche mon jour de départ. Bon voyage à toi et ton mari! Au mois de juillet!

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Dear Internet,

2008 June 19 at 5:17 pm (Uncategorized) (, )

Thanks for making me feel crazy.  There’s just so much to look at, I don’t even know where to begin (or more appropriately, when to end).  I can’t tell if this is a byproduct of my own mental/physical exhaustion or a trait common throughout our generation – I have no attention span whatsoever.

Apart from using three separate blogging entities, and various social networking sites, there’s a constant deluge of news articles to be read and amusing pictures and other stuff sent by friends.  Not to mention Wikipedia.  Ahh!  I’ve been cooped up in this office by myself in a slight panic.  It could be the one or two puffs I took earlier this afternoon.

I am at a loss, to put it simply.  Outside of the internet, back in the IRL world, there is so much that needs to be done or attended to or taken care of or simply thought about.  I feel messy, spilled all over like a beer bottle knocked down.

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Dear Time,

2008 June 17 at 3:05 pm (Uncategorized) ()

I’m thrilled to soon have more of you available on a daily basis.  I must set the bar high, though.  You are coming with a hefty price tag attached and I can’t squander you anymore, solely for the pursuit of pleasure.

I hope to approach you with more seriousness all around, budget you accordingly to match my ambitions.  There is a lot to do, and you have been sorely missed this past year.  I guess this greater appreciation of you will whip my life in shape if I stay focused.

Mostly, I want to fulfill day-to-day aspirations rather than worry about the distant future too much.  The big picture will come together if I can fit the small pieces together first.  I hope I’m not naive.  I’d call it cautious optimism borne of practicality and experience.

I am thoroughly anticipating the challenges you will present to me, however.  I have always disliked dwelling on a sense of the ephemeral, of concluding.  Part of me still feels a villager-mentality mysticism attached to the passing of the seasons.

It’s best to relish you, with no regrets.  Somehow, years later, I always return to the same affirmations.  I suppose it’s reassuring.

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Dear Undeniables,

2008 June 16 at 3:47 pm (Uncategorized) ()

I’ve been remiss.  Hoping to become a little more prolific starting this week, when I have the office to myself, coasting smoothly to my last day at work – and then something new.

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Dear Eunice,

2008 June 12 at 4:35 pm (Uncategorized) ()

Why won’t someone buy you already?  The clock is ticking and I’ve less than a month to pawn you off to another motorist for a reasonable price.  We’ve been through some good times and some bad times the past four years.  You’ve served me faithfully, except for the whole CD player rigamarole.  I am hoping with all my impatient and financially needy and anxious heart that the woman who comes to test drive you on Saturday will clinch the deal.  And then you’re off into the arms of another…  A sad end, but I’ve got hella debt coming on and it would be nice to alleviate the burden at least somewhat.  Eunice, please bring me luck one last time.

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Dear Liver,

2008 June 11 at 8:37 pm (Uncategorized) (, )

I’m sorry.  I’m really really sorry.  You did nothing to deserve this.  I can’t justify myself by saying it was Michelle’s last night in town or we went to a Korean karaoke place or the soju was right there and so was the Coors and the whiskey and Caguama.

Oh, little one, how beat up you must be, how quivering and pulpy and soaked in spirits.  And you certainly had your retribution.  Little did I know this morning, when I woke up feeling peachykeen and singing the theme song from The Jeffersons (“We finally got a piece of the pieeee…”), that you would turn on me in a few hours – with a vengeance.

All of a sudden at work I felt some great metaphysical shift in my qi.  Oh fuck, I thought.  Oh no.  The room seemed to dim and suddenly e-mail was atrociously hard to focus on, Excel spreadsheets were openly hostile, the sound of my boss’ screechy voice nauseating.  I felt dizzy walking to and from the bathroom, where I sat on the toilet with my hands folded impotently over my head, whirling in the nether regions of in-between conscious states.

Curse you, liver, that was not a funny trick to pull in the morning.  I couldn’t even finish my lunch, relegating half a Tupperware full of mezzi rigatoni with pesto and tomato sauce back into the fridge.  You made coffee be the least palatable smell I could imagine, the very thought of those beans and that dark aroma rendering me queasy as a bulimic in her first trimester.

I have paid dearly for my abuses and I am truly sorry, though I can’t promise that it won’t happen again.  Perhaps we need a hiatus, liver.  I will leave you alone for a while and visit with my mistress, Mary Jane.  Maybe we can mend our stormy relationship if we keep a comfortable distance.  I’m certainly hopeful.

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Dear Miriam,

2008 June 9 at 7:37 pm (Uncategorized) ()

Do you ever feel so terrified of the world that being out of doors causes difficulty breathing? Each word that comes out someone’s mouth, every slight gesture or movement, a look in the eyes – they all strike a unique chord of terror. I would much rather slip away into the recesses of my mind, the cocoon of my home, than face the inscrutable machinations of Society.

It seems like an absurd game on a cosmic scale, self-created, self-perpetuated.

What is the point, Miriam?  What is the fucking point?  I don’t see why I should bother to feign interest in meeting anyone’s demands or expectations.

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Dear Fermina,

2008 June 8 at 4:24 pm (Uncategorized) (, )

Your presence was sorely missed at brunch yesterday, but I hope your move went well. I can’t wait to scope out the new pad. Let me know when a good time to drop by may be. I have wine and stories to share.

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Dear Hangover from Hell,

2008 June 5 at 5:18 pm (Uncategorized) (, )

Talk about a rude awakening. Thanks for making me feel utterly obliterated for the first hours of the day. I should’ve eradicated you with late night diner food but I guess we didn’t have the wherewithal for such things after yesterday’s tumultuous events.

At least I’ve learned a few things from you, as always:

- Pomegranate tea is not a viable cure for you. In fact, it made me even more nauseous.

- Aforementioned nausea leading to vomiting five minutes before leaving for work; talk about an inauspicious way to start the day.

- I’m more susceptible to hugging when drunk.

- I’m a better dart player when drunk.

- Drinking cup after cup of straight Seagram’s may seem like a good idea at the time, but will lead to extraordinary bodily discomfort in a few hours.

- It’s easier to stare at people unabashed when drunk. They almost unravel before your eyes, their mannerisms and comportment and social graces (or lack thereof) and self-image. It’s also easy to unravel yourself.

- Cold night at the street corner outside the lesbian bar waiting for a tow truck strikes me as an exquisite feeling of desolation.

- I never learn.

After a brief respite this evening, I will probably do this all over again.

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Dear George Takei,

2008 June 4 at 8:11 pm (Uncategorized) ()

Congratulations on your upcoming marriage!  I love that this piece of news can be featured among other prominent headlines – your “autumn” courtship beginning at age 50, a lasting love of more than twenty years already, and best of all, being proposed to while eating a sandwich.  You can make believers of us all.  Chekov and Uhura at the wedding.  I hope it’s Star Trek-themed.

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